POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER:
By: Isabella Grand
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Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a very common side effect of sexual abuse. I personally never even knew PTSD existed until a some years ago, and approximately 12 years after my abuse has stopped. I was doing some research late one night with my husband, solely on the effects of child abuse when PTSD came up.

​I was eager to find out more and what I found out finally put all the pieces of my life together. I sadly ( and I say sadly with a heavy heart ) had one person whom I thought I was really close to tell me to " build a bridge and get over it" in reference to the abuse. Now, I no longer question myself, but back when those words were spoken to me, they really felt like a knife cutting through my soul.

Now that I know about the PTSD I have a much deeper understanding of what really goes on head that I cannot control. I leaned that there are a lot of things that I can control and then there are things that I cant. Flashbacks to a time and place are one of those things I have learned to deal with.

​This is how PTSD affects me:

​I'm laughing and having a great time with friends or family and then from the corner of my eye I see a white van. Within a millisecond, the smile on my face is wiped off, I think of my abuser and a traumatic event in a white van. I don't make this noticeable to anyone although sometimes someone might ask me if something is wrong. other things that trigger me are sexual scenes in movies, they make me really uncomfortable, if I smell a cologne that one of my abusers used to wear, see a particular clothing item or hair style that resembles them. The sound of someone snoring or seeing couches, if I see a particular looking couch, it's instant tears that boil up in my eyes.

​I never make any of this noticeable, it's a flashback and I have learned to move onto another thought really quickly. The only people that would know any of this would be my husband or best friends. I never found it easy to talk to people because there was either to much betrayal going on around me or not many who would understand.

​I don't choose PTSD, in much the same way I never chose to get abused, the same way people who come back from war don't ask for PTSD either. We are all just trying to get on with our lives, nobody chooses to remember a traumatic event.

​Dreams, nightmares, bed wetting, alcohol abuse, drugs, abnormal sexual behaviour, self harm and low self esteem are all linked to PTSD. 

 I added a  YouTube video insert in which I though was an interesting take on PTSD.

​PTSD is treatable and manageable.

Here at the Isabella Grand Centre we believe that anything and everything is possible, Healing starts when you decide to take the first step.

​If you believe that you may have PTSD it would be a great idea to talk to your GP about it, alternatively you may contact us and we are more than happy to refer you to a qualified psychologist. We do apologise that our Centre and Programmes are not yet available, we do however assure you that they will be in the near future.



​ © Isabella Grand

TRUST: How Child Sexual Abuse Has Altered Your Perception Of Trust

​NO beating around the bush, I'm a survivor myself, I've done my home work on this topic and I have spoken to more than enough survivors and victims. I know without a shadow of a doubt that the most altered perception child abuse has given you is the ability to trust.

​By now we know the statistics, 90% of offenders were known to the victim, that's a whole lot of broken trust. Even when the offender isn't the close relative or friend but it's the teacher or instructor, trust is still broken. The fact is, it's everybodies duty to keep our children safe from harm, hence why we are here talking about child sexual abuse awareness.

Trust is going to be a hard topic for you to battle but it will be rewarding and worthwhile in the end. When it all starts most of us don't think we have a trust issue, we grow up feeling odd about certain things that others are totally ok with yet we cant understand what the conflict is within ourselves.

​Teen and adulthood is mostly when you see the trust issue arising, your PTSD if you have it might be at play here and triggers may set you off, combined with the fact that we cant get a firm grip on our trust issues. A lot of abuse survivors find that their relationships don't work out, often your partner will say things like 'you don't trust me'. If they have no idea of the past abuse you suffered, they can be left quiet confused and leave the relationship. 

You may see the betrayal within your family depending on your situation, you may not get along with certain people and for a long while you may not trust in many people. It's ok, it can all get better, it involves a lot of  self reprogramming but if I can do it then so can you.

​What you need to do first is realise that there is a problem, then the problem can be fixed.  Now that you know, you're not alone and most of us go through it, it may just encourage you to know that your not just going mad.

​Trust is about the one thing nobody can give you medication for, there is not quick fix, I will have an in depth programme on Trust in my Centre which I am super excited about. Letting go of the past and the aftermaths excites me, it's hard work though, on your behalf and mine. You must truly want to change and then just like magic, it will happen..


​ © Isabella Grand
​ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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